Saan mo ba kinuha yung lyrics mo...

... sa songhits?

Christian Bautista messes up the best part of the Philippine national anthem* and apologizes for it. He should thank his stars he looks (and probably sings) way better than Malu Fernandez, else there'd be hordes of people crucifying him online.

Lyrics are a problem only if you don't understand them. One of our neighbors used to be a bodabil (vaudeville) singer and asked for my aunts' help whenever he was learning a new Frank Sinatra song (yes, it was that long ago, Ol Blue Eyes was still releasing new stuff) . He spoke no english and had to have the words explained to him so that he could emote properly.

Now that's dedication.

If Christian Bautista spent half as much time trying to understand what the words of the national anthem meant as our old neighbor did, maybe he wouldn't have mangled it so. Of course it could just be an honest mistake, so apology accepted. But next time, take more care. Schoolchildren sing it properly everyday, a professional singer should do no less.


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Ah, but I remember those old "songhits." The generic term (tagline, I think) for the various music mags in the 80s and 90s that printed press releases from record companies, had a columnist or two, and had chords and guitar guides for amateurs. Back in the days when Magic Sing was still a dream and videoke machines were expensive, drunks had to have a gitarista around to accompany them.

The more dedicated ones had a couple of those thick "1001 Songs" books (so bale 2002 songs ang alam niya?) to bring out. After all, you had to be ready when someone requests "The Way We Were" or some other ditty you weren't familiar with.

But "1001 Songs" contained folk, rock, and pop standards, not the current hits that everyone wanted to sing. To save time trying to make kapa the song, you bought a songhits, which usually gets the basic progression right but mangles lyrics.

Today those mags are becoming unnecessary thanks to the internet. Sites like Ultimate Guitar with its searchable databases, have made the songhits of old obsolete. Click on the link but make sure your pop up blocker is on. Check out the song lists, half the tabbers there are Pinoy.

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*Which isn't technically an anthem; it's a march.

Avast! Mateys

Ahoy there, today be international talk like a pirate day. Arrr.

Bastos daw

Loren Lagarda wants to shut down boybastos.

Of course I can't help snickering when she mentions the "initial investigation done by her office." Ah, to surf for porn in an official capacity, most any man's dream job. (If only I can do it from home)

Boybastos is full of "dirty" pictures but to call it the "filthiest site [they've] come across" is just naive. Either they haven't been to a lot of sites or their definition of filthy is different. Local porn (even hardcore ones) are tame compared to what's readily available online.

That was fuzzin' great

I was afraid the actors in the local staging of "Avenue Q" wouldn't be able to handle all the singing and choreography and puppetry at the same time. The original US production had "Sesame Street" veterans in the cast, so I wasn't sure if Manila actors could hack it.

Luckily my fears have been allayed. And while their puppetry still leaves something to be desired, the singing and overall acting more than make up for it. Not that the puppetry is bad. Unless you compare each scene to the US performances (most of them are up on YouTube), or are a puppeteer by profession, you probably wouldn't even notice much.

The set is a bit sparse, but that's forgivable given the small venue. RCBC theater is a bit intimate (unless you're up in the balcony) which works well for a performance like this. For press night I sat in the front row, which was so close to the stage I could see up Rachel's skirt (she had a unitard on, so none of you pervs call me asking for a change in seats).

The performances were great. Rachel Alejandro manages the transitions from Kate to Lucy well, making full use of her powerful voice. Which, come to think of it, is easy. Kate is Rachel singing "Mr. Cupido," Lucy is when she got older. Newcomer Felix Rivera is perfect as Princeton and hilarious as Rod although his inexperience shows especially when onstage with Joel Trinidad. Joel (who was originally supposed to play Princeton) sings the most popular numbers as Nicky ("If You Were Gay") and Trekkie Monster ("The Internet is for Porn"), which is a feat since the voices are so unalike. Shift your focus from the puppet to his face when watching him.

Props to Aiza Seguerra, who plays Gary Coleman. The New York production cast the part brilliantly, having a woman play it. Manila trumps them by having a fellow former child star, who reinvented herself as a lesbian folk singer, play a black midget who is pitied even by puppets (hmmm... what if she threw in a "duck walk?"). Her "egoy" accent slips a bit but local theater is used to that. (It's nothing like Michael de Mesa's terrible accent in "Proof.")

Frenchie Dy as Christmas Eve looks like a huge Bobby Lee (of MAD TV) with an accent that doesn't feel like a parody. Teenie Chan plays everyone else (the back up birds, the bad idea bear) and does a great job jumping from one puppet to another.

But what carries this show is the material. "Avenue Q" has all of the pop sensibilities of "Rent" minus the angst and death plus the pop culture parody. How many of us have had beer-fueled discussions on the true nature of Bert and Ernie's relationship? Or imagined how puppets reproduced?

"Avenue Q" is played like a "Sesame Street" episode, complete with animated segments and production teaching values like "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" or vocabulary words like "Schadenfreude." It also gives helpful tips like "Buy a case of beer every time, you'll be saving in the long run when you buy in bulk."

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Email or text me for tickets. We're still holding on to the good seats for friends.

Good riddance

I've never even heard of Malu Fernandez until after the thing blew up. I make it a point to avoid "society" columnists and the papers they write for. There is so much information and art to partake of on and offline that it seems a waste of time and effort (and energy and paper) to pay attention to the rantings of crass socialites who, unlike their parents or grandparents, never had to earn a decent living.